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The Following Weekend.

Rowan relaxes for a moment. A fairly mundane week since the meet-up has seen herself and Jacinto falling back into a similar pattern, driving together into work, cooking and cuddling at night.

The major change has been spending a bit of time each night talking in the RFC's group chat, poking at a little bit more serious research, more serious socializing with the chat for the group in their own local region, mostly filled with folks they just met, and on Rowan's part, a little bit of awkward poking into the 'Transfur' channel.

The initial question 'Has anyone else dealt with their fur switching their gender?' was met with a wave of supportive messages and a few offers to PM, and after a bit of open discussion, one person in particular seemed to have been nominated the 'best' to help 'Akari' out.

Now, while Jac' had to go run some errands, Rowan has arranged some time to talk with her new 'guide'. She briefly considered whether or not to meet as herself, or... herself. Her furself, that is. The shift in her idea of herself still felt weird, but it did ultimately feel more comfortable to come in as Akari, with a little bit of 'anonymity' as well, hiding her identity through her real self. That made her giggle a little through her nerves, while she waited for the call.

Soon enough, Rowan's screen lights up for an incoming video call. The caller's name is YenaPotat, with an icon of a grinning spotted hyena as the icon.

Rowan, well, in fur, so most definitely Akari right now, hesitates before answering the call, the doe almost holding her breath, resisting the urge to duck down and hold her snout, she manages a shaky "H-hello? I'm Akari... H-hi."

"Hey there."

The other screen shows a lightly tan, smiling woman with curls of blonde-and-pink hair going down the side of her head. She's quite conventionally attractive, almost petite, and if she had not quite explicitly said earlier that she is trans, it would be hard to guess from her.

The more interesting and arguably more important detail is her being in her fursuit from neck down, dirty brown fur patterned with an eclectic mix of orange stripes and black spots going down her shoulders. She's wearing a cute little purple top that covers her chest but leaves shoulders free.

"Can you hear me? Good. So hey, yeah, I'm Geena, or I go by the 'nick YenaPotat."

Akari laughs nervously, taking in Geena's look, "Y-yes! I can hear you! I... I hope it's not a problem I'm in fur completely, I uh, w-wasn't sure how best to chat.

Geena shrugs: "No problem at all. I usually start these convos like this, but I have my head next to me as well. I can change over if you want." She gives Akari a warm smile that kind of hints that this is not her first time doing this sort of conversation.

Akari shakes her head, "Only... only if that's what you want. I'm fine like this. I'm mostly fine... I..."

She takes a deep breath, "Well... you've seen most of my story from my posts in the thread, right? If... if there's any other questions, that's fine. But, I'm j-just not really sure where to start with all of this... I don't even know what I'm after, really."

Geena nods. She glances at her side, probably reading the thread in question. "Yeah, I read your story. It's certainly pretty earthshaking-" She looks back up to to the screen: "-but at least you dared to reach out, so that's something."

Akari smiles slowly, "W-well, not that earthshaking considering the whole group, right? It's just... it hasn't been that long, so I'm sorry if this is all basic stuff that I'm just not... I don't know... um, 'used to'?"

Geena shakes her head slightly. "It's a huge revelation for you, I'm not downplaying that. So... you first changed just this past Anthrocon? I'm not surprised at all you're a bit confused. I was a total wreck few weeks into my change."

Akari nods, "Yeah... it was a bit of a mess, but we got through it, and... through all the uncertainty, I've come to really enjoy being in fur and what it offers, and we just had our first meet-up last weekend. It's... it's been great! But... almost too good?"

"I keep questioning it, and myself, and what... what I want? The bottom line is, yeah... out of fur, I'm male... and as Akari, I'm female... and when I'm male, the parts I miss the most about being Akari isn't all just the fur and the tail, but... the femininity, the cuteness... being happy with myself..."

Geena smiles: "Sounds very familiar. And to clear one uncertainty right away, I went by 'Gideon' mere..." She stops to do a count. "...seven years ago. Yeesh, has it been that long? Anyway."

She chuckles softly: "The doubt is so familiar. Happier in fur, and eventually realizing that meant happier as a lady, too."

Akari listens carefully, "I... I feel like that's what I want. But I don't know what to do about it. You look fantastic... I'm not exactly 'feminine' out of fur, though."

Geena giggles softly. "Neither was I. The thing is..." She pauses, thinking. "Okay, actually, let's take a step back. How much do you know about the magic we got as a gift?"

Akari laughs tiredly, "Probably a lot less than I should... Everyone seems to have a different theory about who or what started this, and it all seems to feed on our headcanon of our characters, but it's been sorta strange because I've realized Akari is just a lot of my own behaviors magnified."

Geena nods. "The magic works based on desires. If you feel like your fur side should have stripes but you never got around to making them..." She lifts her arm to view, showing the orange stripes with a smile: "Things can change."

Akari hums, looking down at herself, "My partner got told something similar. Makeup or little cosmetic changes can become permanent if your mental image changes."

Geena nods. She considers for a moment, gets a bit of a devious smile. "And well, it's not just that. I'd ask you to sit down, but seems you are already." She takes a breath, always somewhat enjoying this part. "...the magic can change your non-fur side too."

Akari blinks, ger expression going blank as she tries to process this. Her ears flick a few times, "WHAT? That's... That's impossible, isn't it? It can't... I mean... That'd be... Wh... Y... How? How?! S-sorry, sorry, that's just... That's a lot."

Geena follows Akari's reaction with a growing smile. "Like I said, I went by 'Gideon' some years ago."

Akari blinks again, only just starting to get it, "Are... You're actually a woman?" She cringes immediately, "S-sorry, that sounded way worse than I meant it, I just mean... You... You actually changed?"

Geena giggles at the incidental coarseness, waving it away: "I have not been on any kind of hormones for a day in my life. All natural... er, naturally magical."

Akari nods, suddenly feeling a wave of anxiety wash over her, "I... W-wow... Magic... Right. I don't know if... If that's what I want, or... I mean, I don't even know if I'm really..." She paused, almost whispering the word, still so new to her mind, "T-trans. Or... Just curious because of the experience in fur... Or... Whatever I am."

Geena smiles: "You may want to start from taking a deep breath, while I try to explain how it works, far as we know."

Akari slumps a little apologetically, "S-Sorry..." She takes a moment to try and center herself, taking a few deep breaths.

Geena smirks: "Atta girl. So... yeah, it's a biggie. But as I was saying, it's based on desires. What you want, what you really want. Maybe even without realizing it, but... well let's put it this way, neither of us are alone in building a fursuit based on some wishful thinking."

Akari blushes slightly, a grin creeping on her face at Geena's praise. She nods, "It's... A little bit... I liked the performance aspect, yeah."

Geena nods: "Some of that. Before all this happened to me, I know I had been at least dreaming of being a girl, but knowing it would be kind of impossible. Cosplay and especially fursuiting became an escape. For a bit I could be someone else, some imagined 'other' that had her life like she wanted it to be."

She chuckles: "Well, escapism turned into passion, and then boom suddenly magic and I had my dream." Pauses. "...kind of, as you now know."

Akari frowns, "Some of that for me too... Cosplay was a way to be less self-conscious about myself. I've always sorta hated my looks, felt like I stood out, but in the worst way. Suiting up I could be more social and happy without worrying about other people judging me... I never considered being a girl before though... I mean... Not much more than idle imaginings, not like a serious thought."

Geena nods again: "That's the way it mostly was for me before the change. And for some time after." Her smile wanes: "Tell you the truth, I was in denial. I couldn't believe it, I mentally filed away the possibility that I would be female when in fur."

She then smiles again with some amusement: "...and after denial, I started bargaining with myself if it's still kind of okay to occasionally be in fur, which then went to finding meets and cons some more, which created a desire to do more of it. And to count from the stages, I was then a bit depressed and angry that I was still boring ol' Gideon whenever I couldn't be in fur."

Akari frowns, thinking less of herself in that moment and more on Cindi, "I've... I've just wanted to be in fur as much as possible. The boring ol' self hits home though. At first I worried I wanted to be Akari too much. It took me awhile to realize what I wanted wasn't to be Akari all the time, but just to be happy with myself the ways she is. It's been hard to wallow too much when I have a partner with me, but... They've had their own struggles, so some parts I felt like I had to bottle up... But thankfully we've opened up to each other about our thoughts. If it weren't for them, I'd probably be in way worse shape about this whole thing, instead of just unsure and confused. I've felt the spectre of that depression..."

Geena looks at Akari quizzically: "Your partner then... also in fur? In know about all this?"

Akari nods, "We suited together... And charged together. And we're going through all of this together. It's not my place to talk about her feelings on all this though... I just worry about her."

She looks down a moment, then shakes her head, "S-sorry... Not really relevant."

Geena smiles again: "It is relevant in the sense that you have someone to share this with. Pretty lucky in that regard." She considers for a second, then continues: "But, to get back to how this may end helping you... and I'd say that it may still not be easy, but I hear myself in you, that kind of 'I will do anything' I think I can read inbetween lines, so to say. Am I wrong?"

Akari hesitates a moment, agonizing on how to... What? Justify this? Explain it away? Maybe there is some denial still there, telling her she's not good enough or worthy enough or... Or something.

She looks back up at the screen and nods. "Yeah... It feels like that pretty hard. You're not wrong."

Geena nods. "Sounded like it."

"So anyway. I was pretty miffed at my maleness out of fur. At some point I started channeling that feeling into research. Started looking up how the process goes. Really wanted to get started to doing something about it, even if the results would not be that great. Took a year of waffling about the maybes of it before I could push myself to do anything. Eventually managed a therapist appointment or two."

"Then on the morning I'd psyched myself to make a doctor's appointment, I realized I had already started to change. In my hurry to make it happen... I had missed the actual signs of it happening. My skin was smoother, my hairs had gotten softer, the fat on my body had started to rearrange... and maybe I imagined it at first, but my voice felt lighter, higher."

Her smile glows like a new morning sun reflected on sea horizon. "I never made that call."

Akari nods, breathing out a sigh, "That... Does sound wonderful... I guess that's where I'm at, the research, and the Want to do something, but not knowing what that should be."

Geena smiles: "I hate to sound cryptical about it, but best I can offer is that the magic knows when you do."

Akari chuckles, "Magic kinda throws a whole new thing into it, yeah... So... It's really just, if I want it bad enough and the magic will make it happen? Wh-what if I don't?"

Geena hums: "I have not yet heard of a fur who was in our situation and it didn't eventually happen. The pattern has been mostly the same for everyone; once you are dead set you will do it with or without magic, that seems to be the sign." She considers: "You may or may not know, but that's kind of how it works in the mundane, nonmagical world too. The doctor prescribing the hormones needs to be reasonably certain that you are absolutely certain."

Akari thinks for a moment, then nods, "I... I haven't looked that deep into it yet, the non-magical means. But sorta started it all this week. I... I want this. I'm just... Scared."

Geena smiles warmly: "That is perfectly normal, regardless of means. It's your own self-identity that's at play, after all."

Akari sighs, "It's been a struggle trying to manage Akari, my male self, and where I actually am between them both. And I didn't want to do something that would push away my partner." That fear is still present, if muted since their recent talks.

Geena nods: "I understand. And don't feel like you have to decide on those lines right now. You have nothing to prove to anyone but yourself-" She chuckles: "And we are our own worst critics."

Akari smiles softly, "That's... Completely true. No one hates me more than I do." She laughs sadly, "B-but I want to change that. I want to love myself as much as Akari loves herself. My furself, as we've been calling it."

Geena blinks, then giggles. "I don't know how almost everyone indepently comes up with that pun. Talk about connection deeper than the magic itself."

Akari blinks in turn, then giggles, "Maybe? It's destiny. I... Thanks, Geena. I've a lot to think about, but at least it feels like I have a path to walk now. Or... Signs to look out for that I'm on the right one."

Geena smiles: "Happy to help. And I mean that, it's definitely become a thing for me to help budding trans-furs on their path, and I love doing it. Toss me a message anytime if something bugs you."

Akari smiles, "I'll reach out if I need to. I... I need to talk to my partner about all of this, and then... Figure out who I want to be outside of fur."

Geena winks: "You go, girl. If 'girl' is what you end up feeling you are. Say hi to your partner from me, and see you online."

Akari giggles, feeling a rush at being called a girl once more, "Will do!" She closes the call, leaning back on her seat to let that warmth run across her.

She... Can do it. She can change? She just needs to talk to Jac' about all of this, another new wrinkle in the whole magic mess.

Geena looks at the ended call for a moment in amusement, then shakes her head. "Another one... I swear the furry community is more queer than not," she comments at no one in particular.

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